YUGIOH: Joey In Wonderland
by ElementalDrake
Summary: To Love, You Need Bond. Joey's Dad Starts To Act Up The Worst, Kaiba Starts To Notice. Joey Feels Bad For His Father, Kaiba Wants Joey To Get out. Kaiba Needs To Make His Moves Carefully To Save Him, And Joey Will Enter His Bitter-sweet Dreams. SxJ,yaoi!
1. It Was My Life

_**Joey In Wonderland**_

_Chapter 1: It Was My Life_

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I remember getting out of school; relieved to be away at last. I asked Yugi if he was free anytime today, since as always I never wanted to be home. But just like most days, he gave me that embarrassed expression and weird laugh, explaining how he was going to be with Yami again; and I never was mad at him for it, as usual since I know they must be getting addicted to their 'private times'.

I remember hearing a familiar voice, with the familiar 'Mutt' called with it. And as usual I growled; only because it was extremely annoying and I didn't see how I even looked like one!...sorta. "So if it isn't you Mutt, I haven't seen you all day so I've noticed, and it feels good not to be able to see even a lock of you anywhere" he wore his annoying smirk, and his all-mighty expression. I hated how prideful he was, but I was mostly glad he didn't know I was trying to avoid him. Yes, _avoiding_ him for awhile was my goal; since I have grown strong feelings for mister 'Moneybags'.

"Look moneybags! I'm not in the mood so leave me alone!" and at that instant my body just jolted; I spun and ran towards the city. It was natural, and I guess my body could tell if I was around him any longer I would just break, and I couldn't have that, I just couldn't.

So as usual I went to my work; I was a waiter and I served at this restaurant I worked at, nothing special. And as usual it was pretty loud, noisy, and I always wore my fake smile to every greedy bastard who went there. No matter how filthy they spoke to me I always had to keep my cool and take their order no matter how they treated me or else I'd get fired. I obviously couldn't afford another bad beating from my bad to I took it like the man I was and made it through another day of hell number two; since one was school where Kaiba was.

When I grasped my monthly check in my hands; I swear my eyes lit up like a million candles before I said my farewells to a few people who were nice to me there, then I headed out down to my bad neighborhood where my so called home was. I knew my father needed me, and I kind of needed him; I couldn't live on my own and he couldn't live without my money and the food. As usual I welcomed myself in through the door, but not fully without presenting my worthless self in his house. "I'm home dad" I spoke a bit loud, but not too much just in case he was asleep; but sadly I was mistaken. "Dammit boy shut up! And make me some food" his loud voice rang through my ears; I hated this drunkard with the greatest of passions.

I was kind of happy when he didn't ask for my check; I was hoping it was one of those rare moments when he completely forgot, until the next month. As I made my way to the kitchen, preparing a sandwich for him, I heard a creaking sound; and I knew I would regret everything since I made my way through that door.

"Who do you think you are! You think I'm some dumbass for not remembering? Well you are one boy with some balls!" and immediately I felt the sharp pain to my groin, and I immediately fell to my knees. The next thing I knew when I turned up to look at him; which another horrible mistake was glass, and the smell or alcohol filling my nose.

* * *

"I'm sorry but…it might take him a few weeks to recover from this, it's severe and it's critical that he must visit every Friday for check-up, and make sure it's to me". That was the first voice I heard, and it seemed like an older guy, but calm and worried at the same time; man was I in for a ride. I tried to open my eyes but it was prevented by from what I felt, cloth. I figured that my head might have been bleeding and wrapped, but what truly scared me was, who brought me here? Who actually saw my pathetic body lying there on the ground?

"Alright, thanks but you're not needed at the moment so leave" I heard a cold voice speak up at last, and a small _'pft'_ from the doctor before I heard the door click, most likely closed. "So mutt…want to tell me why you were just lying there on the street?" I heard the voice come closer, sitting right next to me and I dreaded each moment.

I wouldn't speak to him, and I could tell that it was really aggravating him. "What happened, Kaiba" I spoke low, and soft, I wanted peace but most of all I wanted to carry on a conversation with him without yelling; if so maybe we could get somewhere, or so I want to convince myself. "That's what I want to know mutt, I come strolling by because my new driver to sub lost his way and he tells me that some shaggy blonde was lying there dead on the street, of course I knew better lucky for you".

I felt like I wanted to die; to have him of all people, no, to have that substitute driver loose his way to my pathetic body? Man this is the worst! But I just tried to keep my cool, and for some reason, focusing was hard for me too. I rubbed my temple with my wrist, wondering where the pain was all of a sudden coming from, a groan escaped my lips but I couldn't help it since the pain was increasing, my will of restraint was decreasing.

Next thing I knew I was yelling, yelling for the pain to stop, and feeling extra hands trying to hold me down. After a few minutes my power was dissipating, but so was the pain and I was happy for that. Except now, the pain was originating to the area around my eyes…why my eyes? I wanted to know so badly but of course before I knew it, I was out cold.

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I remember the next few days, Yugi, Yami, Kaiba, Tea…I remember everyone's voice, and I heard their worry complaints. I sat up; all I could do was stay quiet for their questions, Why? Because I didn't know for myself what truly happened. "All I can tell you is, that my dad must have thrown something to me a bit too hard and I must of fallen back and bunked my head, that's all I know" I tried to give them a small smile, which was easier since I couldn't see their faces so a fake smile was complete.

"I need you all to leave, NOW" I heard kaiba's voice above all, increase into a dreadful tone. Everyone must of taken it seriously, even Tristan since I didn't hear even a peep out of anyone except the door once again.

"I know it was your father…I was doing some research and it turns out that your father has been abusing you for awhile now" and at that moment my heart sunk. I never wanted anyone to know my secret, cause how would they all think of me? Low? Worthless? Pathetic? How can I look into his eyes ever again…will he go so low as to tell too? Too much was running through my mind as he slowly started to put the puzzle together.

"And it seems like today of all days, he got so mad at you, he hit you then threw you out" and all I knew what that it had to stop. I threw one of my fists down beside my leg, letting it thump down to the bed; showing I was clearly fed up.

"Stop…just stop now Kaiba! For a while now I've been trying not to deal with your all-mighty attitude and how much of a bastard you can be" I felt myself chocking up. What I truly wanted to do was not yell at him, but to cry, just to cry out all my pain and to be comforted by him; but dreams are dreams, they need to stay that way. "Thanks for tha help but ya need ta leave me alone! I'm done Kaiba!" I felt my throat strain out the last bit. It was done, I had said it, and I felt grief topple over me.

I knew my head could only lower down to my lap, I feared if I dare to look anywhere else I would grovel to his feet, apologize, and cry over my so called 'life'. "He made you blind." At that second…I felt my heart break. I swallowed hard, and I felt my heart pounce, trying to rip out of my chest as his voice dared to go on. "Seemed like glass cut your eyes, and some pieces were stuck, you have a chance of recovery though" His voice became different, and by now I could tell the difference…It only frightened me more. "Kai-" "from now on…I would prefer you under my care Mutt, no exception!" I heard his loud figure rise from his seat, and I heard the tapping of his feet flowing away, ready to leave me in a empty room with my thoughts.

"Kaiba I can't! We've hated each other and now in my time of need you pity me? No thank you look I can take care of myself! If you're so stubborn then when I'm better, I'm on my own" I was determined to show him how good I am. At this perfect moment, I felt determination of showing him how strong I can be, how much of a man I truly am.

"Fine" was all I heard before the door opened, then clicked back closed, and I sat there, unable to cry on the outside, but I knew that inside I was pouring down streams.

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The next day I awoke, and my body immediately ached, and I groaned out loud; only hoping no one was in my room. I huffed, betting no nurse came in to give me another sedative or whatever they call it. Slowly I managed to sit up, and immediately my mind raced to _him_. I felt like I'm going to go insane, to not see the brown locks, to not see his stupid grins and those lips…I can feel the creepers coming up.

As I clutched my head, letting my thin fingers curl around the straps of the bandages, I felt my knees rise to my chest as I let out a scream. It was killing me, going on days without seeing the expressions of my friends, of kaiba…to see was all I truly had, to envy and now I couldn't do that, all I saw was the darkness; and that scared me most of all.

I felt my fingers acting up, pulling off the bandages as if it was some holy object upon a demon, and I felt my fingers grip my own hair as my legs thrashed a bit wildly. Since I had to rely on my sense of hearing, I've become quite sharp at that, so hearing the door click open over my screaming, I knew I'd feel the grips of nurses and whoever else holding me down, sedating me, and wrapping me back up.

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"He hasn't consumed much food since he came, he has been neglecting it, but we have been putting water in his body for the most. As you can see he is losing weight, and this is common among stressed people, especially some who have to go through not seeing. I will put him in your home care and have procedures done there if you must have it that way" the familiar old doctor's voice came again, and again it was the first thing I herd. I guess I haven't been eating, but at the same time I've noticed…if you can't see, time doesn't really matter, and I guess being worked up and what not has probably caused me to stray from food but who can eat when they find out their blind? I obviously can't…

"Yes, In my care I will make sure he gets whatever he needs, prepare him for transportation" "yes sir". I knew the plans without asking, and I knew I would dread this with maybe a passion…I guess this experiment will do nicely? Let's see how long Kiba can stand my worthless being in his all-might house. I know I shouldn't but since it was Kaiba, I was looking forward to becoming a bit of a burden to him, but I like to call it more like 'needing a lot of his attention'.

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**Wooow okay now I'm doing 3 stories at a time but the JxS stories inspired me soo much to do one finally! Lol tell me if it's any good? ;3 or if it's interesting because I got some good ideas; and it will ALWAYS be in either Joey's or Kaiba's POV! **


	2. Turning Things around

**_Joey In Wonderland_**

_Chapter 2: Turning Things Around_

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_Everything was mostly a blur to me; I cannot recall much after hearing Kaiba wanting me to be moved at his house. Man can my condition get any worse?

I knew that even though it was a real pain, somewhere inside, passed my stubborn exterior I truly wanted to be cared for by Kaiba. As you as well may know...I try so hard to push my love away for the man by hating him with every passion, to do everything that is the opposite of showing affection or showing I care.

It hurts me every day, It does but I seem to fall for what I can't have. Deep down I love him so much, but at the same time I know I shouldn't bother because if hating him can get me close to him; so be it, our fights pull us together, his little nickname for me is a bit mean but at the same time, I do kind of think it's a bit of a sexual name you would call a lover.

I don't know how to really explain it I guess; but the main point now was that all I been through has led me up to this, being transferred to Kaiba's mansion, but mean while I have to suffer being in the same car with the one man I've loved for so long…and I don't know If I can take it. I sat there, feeling the road, and hearing the tough engine roar in dominance to the others as the driver made his way. Even if I couldn't see, I could tell as usual the air was suffocating for me; to be with him, around him with no logical reason in my mind that doesn't include fighting has stressed me to the max.

"Joe-I know you can hear me Mutt so don't make me reverberate myself multiple times but you are coming with me at my mansion, don't ask why or don't even bother asking questions" his rough icy voice echoed in my ear. To me and others his voice never gave sign of mercy, and many feared his wrath, even now he used it even though I have no idea why he is since I cannot see his reactions to help tell, but I'm sure he's forgetting that at the moment…

"I hear ya Kaiba…no need ta tell me since I don't bother askin ya for a reason". I wanted to project my voice more, to show him how irritated I am with his nonsense but sadly, my body acted differently; I was sad and wanted to know why me, and my body showed exactly that…my weakened state.

"Hn" I heard his signature grunt. He seemed to do that every once in a while, when he has nothing to say sometimes. But what I was truly worried about was my drunken father… I know the man would beat me senseless, and I would find ways to hide it perfectly, and then he would kick me out after a beating only to let me back inside to be his little bitch.

"Kaiba…I want rest…" I figured he would be at my right, only to slightly turn my head to his direction. My voice sounded weak, fragile, and thin like paper. I felt the lump in my throat like I was swallowing a giant pill. "I want ta lay down…and sleep myself away". It was my voice, remembering how angry and lost my father's gunna be, and all my worried friends…I'm truly feeling ill to my core, like some sick disease running its final course.

I feel like what I said was too much…I don't know how he's going to react, and if he's going to pick up anything by my suspicious behavior. But one thing that was for sure… I want to sleep away all this, to never worry, to be free, to feel needed, and to feel that I can actually belong.

"_Joey.."_

Such a sweet echo…was that my name? I know I am not delusional, at least not yet, but the sweet tone of my voice being called, the soft, gentle ease that slid with it…I must be in some wonderful dream. Who was it to say it? At the moment I cannot think…At the moment, I feel that I'm falling asleep.

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"Wonder if the poor boy will be okay…" "I hope so; he doesn't look injured other than this and of course the obvious..." "Guess you're right Renna". _Girls_, the first thing I hear now, waking up from consciousness was girls but…oh no, have they stripped me of my shirt and pants? Have they found evil deeds that have been committed upon me? One thing I knew that I had to do was hide, hide everything, I have to pretend, every single bit.

I pushed my upper body up forward with a jolt of pain from my quick reflexes. It hurt so much, probably sores that need to be ridden of. I quickly remembered my initiative and flailed my arms in front of me, giving out the obvious 'no' sign.

"Please don't speak a word of this! I beg of ya, just give me my clothes back and don't dare speak a word to moneybags!!" My heart was pounding, I felt the pressure against my bare skin, and I bet it was beating so hard the girls could probably see it poking out pumps.

I could see the shock and freight in their eyes. But I guess I can't blame them if a supposedly 'knocked out' man immediately sat up speaking words of nonsense. "B-But sir! Your wounds-!" I didn't want to hear a word of it. I could hear the slight fabric noise clearly; I was definitely grateful for my heighten hearing to replace my eye sight since I seemed to surprised them by snatching the fabric from one of them.

I myself, was shocked that from what I felt, seemed to be my clothes, well lucky snatch I guess. I quickly and carefully tried to place my shirt on first, and the girls kept insisting I don't. it was becoming quite bothersome since I just wanted nothing to change, just my eye sight, nothing more was really necessary.

It seemed for like hours before I finally got my white-T on and my long bark blue pants as well. At least…the last time I saw my clothing was that, not sure was exactly I'm wearing now since it seems fresher but I sure hope it's _my_ clothing.

"I knew I smelled an awaking Mutt…what do you think you're doing moving up and about?", I knew from such a nickname, and from a unique icy tone…it was my passions worst enemy. "I dun get what exactly goin on Kaiba! I wake up and I feel fewer clothes on me and I hear ta girls! What exactly or how exactly am I suppose ta react?!", I expected something of the sort to of course come out of his mouth, and I gave one of the most used lines when in this kind of situation.

I could read his face like the morning sky; his pale complexion matching nicely with his deep, icy blue eyes. Every time I looked into them I felt a sensation in my body. Not the fact that he shows how venomous he is through them, but how for quite a while, If I stare deep into them I feel warm, safe, and a hint of fakeness to calm my nerves, at least…I remember that when I wasn't blind.

I want to believe behind his icy outlook, he's just trying to protect himself from the world like a child, but at the same time I want to believe that it's just a true nature of his; To push others away, and to hold close only his family; for instance…his baby brother.

"React like nothing, you can't even see so shut up and let me treat you" I heard his voice becoming irritated, and before I knew it, I felt the tight grip of a hand, wrapping tightly around my arm as it forced me down into the pillows once more.

"Look Mutt…I can't babysit you twenty-four-seven so it would be nice if you can just cooperate for me"

At this point I felt a bit melancholy…I felt a heavy sensation on my chest, as if something was pressing hard on top of me. But I just nodded; at the moment I didn't trust my voice, and I have the feeling I won't be for quite some time.

I heard a _click, _and from there I already knew the man I loved left me once more in a place, a place that belonged to him, every object was his, and I sat here, seeing only darkness as I was surrounded by things that would scream Kaiba. I noticed myself chuckling, but who to blame other than myself? I was indeed a piece of art in the making.

I carefully placed myself back down, feeling no need to be awake no longer. But so far now, the only problem was that I could not sleep, the urge to rest has faded slowly when Kaiba came in for his visit.

Just his name placed me in a trance…but I do not know how much longer I can stand without eyesight. Watching the tall, lean, built figure almost every day had become an addiction to my soul; of course I do not stalk him or anything of the sort…but to daydream of a fantasy, my only escape route where anything I want can happen.

To fantasize of me and him, on a nice silky bed, flowing colors or blue and red, and the silent please we would get from one another as his body hovered over me, kissing down from my collar bone slowly, to my chest. To slowly gaze into his hues only to find something that I would never imagine seeing, our undying love never dying...such a bliss moment, but sadly every time I would imagine that part, it became a blank to me.

I usually wonder at times like this, if he would ever smile for someone, not his evil smile that gave the other promise of damnation, but the kind that only that special person gets all to their selves. Or even his chuckles, of course maybe not the evil victory kind, but the type of laugh that tells you off the bat he's comfortable around you.

My finger somehow found its way to my lips, lightly tracing myself as I imagined Kaiba doing it to me. I do have to admit, I do find my imagination getting a little wild, I do not think of anything that includes intercourse surprisingly; when the day comes, I rather experience it them imagine. But for now I imagine the simple bliss of him, pleasuring me with his hands, then with his tongue to my cool skin...sometimes I do hate it, especially now since I feel my hand getting in character.

Slowly, my hand trailed to my erected pink nub, rubbing my finger slightly against it made my body shiver, and it made my manhood twitch in anticipation. But I cannot…to defile the house of the man I love by acting on my fantasies was purely…bad?

I never found my thoughts innocent, not since my father would sometimes leave porno's running in the living room as he knocked himself out by the alcohol.

I think that was around the time my thoughts faded from women, to think how my mother was venomous to me; making me suffer alone with a drunkard who abused me left to right. But I guess I cannot blame her…I rather I suffer then my sister, she deserves nothing of the sort, it's me, a devil, a sin, a curse who should put up with a man who broke down.

The day my father figured out I had become less attracted to women was the day I had felt what I thought was my worst beating ever. But, the day he found out my love for Kaiba…I thought I would never see the day or light again. All I could see was red, all I could feel was the numbness or every inch or my whole body.

But at times now, through all I been through I find myself not completely hating him…I find that who I hate the most, who I despite with every feeling in my body was…_myself_. Maybe If I was strong enough, maybe it's not too late…no…I know my father by now, the man cannot change for the life of himself, and I hate that all I can do is bid by his every will, and place my fake smile on my face every day just so my friends wouldn't worry. If I say myself…I'm the best damn actor.

I slowly rolled to my right, bringing up the covers that my hands finally found under my chin, and laid there in the fetal position. Now that I think of it, this darkness is perfect for me, I feel no worry, no where I need to look. It's like being in my own little room, slowly rehabilitating myself, consoling myself with thoughts, and trying to figure who I really was.

* * *

I had slept, a few hours since I had slept so much before. I did not feel tired, but at the same time I did not feel like elevating off the bed so I just decided to lay here, same position, until I found a need, or a reason to get up.

"Joey?...are you up?" I slightly turned on my back, my head turned towards where the sound originated from. That voice was not Kaiba's of course, but it sounded smaller, childish…oh…

"Mokuba? Well is it you squirt?" my voice coyed with the boy, and I think I could sense a smile on his face, he was always a very bright child, and I loved that trait from him; I usually wished I could be as positive as him when times called for it.

"I'm so happy you're awake! Big brother told me you were in here and you might have been sleeping and not to bother you…but I obviously didn't listen to that part". I couldn't help but smile and chuckle at little Mokuba; he is so mischievous when it comes down to things like this, so far that I know. I wanted to pat him on the head, show him how silly he was and mess with him just like in the good old days, but I couldn't…

Next thing I know, I felt something around my body, and I almost wanted to cry; Mokuba must have been thinking something of the sort, because I felt like he was soothing me, trying to help and tell me it was okay by hugging me, I did feel better, and I hugged the small raven boy back.

It took me back to many good memories, being around his cheerful attitude, then hearing Kaiba grunt cause he has to stand for it…I hope I can see again, I hope I can get out of this mess. I just want my eyes to heal, and everything to go back the way it should be, me out of Kaiba's life…

"Mokuba, its good ta see ya squirt! Tanks for tha hug…I needed dat" I spoke softly, as if the walls could hear, letting the grateful gratitude soak in to both of us. I wish I could see his cute smile, but that of course has to wait. "I'll bring you some food a bit later okay Joey? I'm sure Seto is out looking for me, making sure I didn't disobey him as usual" I felt the bed move and shutter quickly as it then faded, and once again I heard the clicking of the door, making me alone once more in thought.

But thinking was becoming sickening, I wanted to do something, to get my dear Kaiba to notice me again…all the fights we had, everything, I begged for his attention no matter what way it was, as long as his eyes were on me. I patted my fist to the bed, I was tired of lying around, and I'm Joey Wheeler! A man who can face hell, and take pain at any ounce to get or do what I need to.

Without hesitation I pulled the sheets off my body, making them fly off somewhere to my right. My hands searched for the edge, gripping tightly I managed to pull my legs off the bed, only to feel that if I have been running for hours. I took another deep breath, and off the bed I went; I stood up straight, it did take me a bit since I have been off my feet for quite some time. Once I regained my balance from my wobbly legs I took a step forward, feeling the cold floor beneath, setting shivers down my spine.

I felt better about myself now, being able to do this without anyone to help me made my day or…night. I extended my arms, easily feeling the wall; I allowed it to guide me forward; knowing very well by now that the door was north of me, somewhere.

It was strange though, even I knew very clearly my legs where fine, but somehow they started to ache after a few steps, the soreness grew through my thighs down to my toes; and it felt like my legs were definitely moving for yards without stop. For some reason my breathing became unsteady, as did my balance; and before I knew it…I felt the pain again, and with such habit I could only let out my loud screams of pain; only wishing for it to stop, to stop and let me have mercy.

I started to hear rapid footsteps, and the bashing open door noise; but to me it did not matter much, just the fact that I wanted the pain to ease. It seemed to originated to my leg, then it spread through my whole leg, aching and pumping every muscle with pain and the feeling of being sore.

I heard him again; I heard of the man who took me in, and I loved it. I started to rethink this; maybe it was lucky to have him find me, and sooth me. I was able to turn down to only whimpers, just so I can hear his wonderful, caring voice.

"Puppy!-Mutt! I'm going to carry you to the bed okay? Then I want you to explain to me why the hell you got out!" and just like he had said, I felt his built, strong arms cradle me up, I felt his heartbeat against my head. It felt soft, it felt kind, loving…and all I wanted was to hear its beautiful melody of life until I roll over on my grave; but sadly just like sleeping, everything must come to an end.

He gently placed me in bed, and quickly after I felt the silk covers come over my body, hugging me loosely around my body. I gave a light sigh; I felt much better being off my feet because now it felt like my leg is pulsing, but with not as bad as pain and soreness.

"So! Why the hell did you get up!" "Joey! Oh my god joey! Are you ok I heard what had happened from one of the maids here!" I heard that soft squeaky voice, the body climbed up, sitting close to me as he waited for my answer.

"yea Mokuba…I'ma okay, at least now I yam tanks to your brother". I felt the aura, and it seemed a bit awkward; only making me wonder if Mokuba was looking at him as he looked back, exchanging looks most likely or something…

"Mokuba leave please, I must teach this Mutt something about getting out of bed". His voice seemed kind of angry, but it was more venomous than anything..

And sadly Mokuba did leave after a second, his body slowly crawled off the bed, closing the door behind him, only to leave me alone with him…how awful this seemed to be, since my greed for company got mister Moneybags angry at me; his face must look as cute as it use to be.

"Mutt…why did you leave this bed, you know better than to get up, did I not tell you a while ago not to get up for anything! All you needed was to ring the bell!" "Kaiba…what bell? I'm blind an ya neva told me of no bell ya balloon"

"Wha?- the bell?! Did someone forget to bring it in here?..well…it was supposed to be on the stand, but I will get someone to bring it in here when I'm done with you, and done with firing the person I told to bring the bell as well…they shall pay dearly.."

I could never get why…he seemed to be covered in vengeance, and It only made me more confused about the male. I want to understand him more, and so far I know the outer him top to bottom; just simply by being around him so much, and pushing his buttons got me to figure some things out itself too.

"Kaiba…ya don't know what it's like…Kaiba-" I want to tell him…even if it hurts me, even if it hurts both of us, even…even if he starts to ignore me or something…I want to tell him how I feel, but I'm scared? Kaiba.._I love you_.

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_**Ohh Geeez! This is probably...my LONGEST chapter done in any of my stories!! lol I was gunna continue but I decided to cut it off there BWAHAH! it gives me something else to add to the next chapter. So THANKS to everyone who had addid this story to favorites or whatever; it shows me I might be doing good? lol well I hope it won't be too long before I write the next, thanks again everyone!!3**_

__--Q.S.O


	3. Can't it just End?

_So you reader's know, this chapter takes place before the day of his eye injury. I decided to make a few chapters that will be the past; which builds up to the love between the two, and then forward more to where he is being treated…and yes! I won't tell you, but there's a present time, and you will see when we get there. [:_

_**Joey in Wonderland**_

_Chapter 3: Can't it just end?_

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The first thing I saw when I came to…was the bright living room lamp. I don't know what exactly happened...or how for that matter. The last thing I remember was entering my house quietly, then creeping into my room but halfway into the hall…I can't remember anything from there. Though now that I think about it, it doesn't take much brainpower to figure out who would do that to me…my _dad._

I felt pretty numb as usual; happens almost every time I come home late, usually because I'm with my friends all night…Them dragging me out to places and forcing me to stay overtime. I can say now, that we're almost finished with school that, they're really tuning down the responsibility knob.

Can't anything be easy for me? Can't I have time to myself every once in a while? Or time to where I can see Kaiba…

Yes, I will admit, I do still long to be in his arms every night, being comforted and told I would be safe, and wake up every morning not having to be cautious or always alert. I don't know why I love him; especially since love is a strong word. It's something one shouldn't take so lightly, it's a step that many people take granted for, it's something people like to over use, but never understand the meaning of it…it sickens me when people just throw those words around, it's quite pathetic.

Coming from me that's surprising right? A lot of people wouldn't expect the Joey, the jokester of the group to know such mature things. But I'm not always what I appear to me, I'm a whole different me, a different side of me that's concealed within.

But really, as I finally got up after my daze finished its course; I decided it would be a good Idea to know where my dad is just to be on the safe side of things…

He wasn't in the living room, since I was laying oddly in it, even though my vision lost in the hall. So I went down there, very carefully to avoid the squeaky spots on the ground; after a few years living with him, it's a good thing to know how to avoid contact in any way at any time. I crept to his door, peering inside, and as I thought, the monster laid inside, sleeping without a care in the fucking world. I never wanted to be like him, I don't ever want to…I just hope a son could avoid those kinds of possibilities.

Looking at my wrist watch I noticed school was going to start, damn! Carefully running into my room I changed clothes, put some good ol' Deo on and carefully ran back out the door, finding my school bad safely hidden in a bush; the same place as always.

* * *

"So, how are things going so far Joey? Made any progress yet?" the little guy whispered to me. "Um..I'm not sure…He pisses me off so much but..." yes, I have told Yugi about my crush with Kaiba, and surprisingly enough, he supported m e. He felt the same way I did; that no one should tell others who to love, it's how you feel and there's nothing wrong with that.

I found it strange coming from his mouth, him knowing a bit 'too well'…until he told me that he and the pharaoh were dating as well, but it was a secret. He decided to tell me since I trusted him enough to tell him about my crush; guess it was a win for a win? Either way, I'm happy.

"Hey...What are you guys whispering about" Tristan decided to lean in on me and ask, I of course leaned towards Yugi as he leaned towards the pharaoh; chain reaction from _idiots._ "Jeez Tristan, you're so snoopy you like being I everyone's conversation". I know it was rude of me, he's my best pal but…whenever I wake up from getting a bottle smashed over my head, I won't be in the best of moods, so I just leaned back, drinking my soda as we sat on the school's hill. Tea was absent, due to some injuries, and we haven't seen Duke anywhere either, Not sure why.

"Joey…look over there" I heard my small pal whisper to me as I slowly looked in the direction that he was looking in. I almost released a light gasp, but luckily I caught myself. I saw Kaiba a few ways from where we were, leaning against a tree reading a book. Though it looked like he's slightly dozing off, and the sun lightly touching his pale skin…he looked beautiful, I won't lie, he looked astonishing, just leaning there. It took Yugi a few tries to make me look away to leave for class.

* * *

"Now, as we all know I have said about two weeks ago about a project, and so I am currently deciding groups, and when I have I will inform you all and we will start. Until then, I have printed copies of the worksheets and what we will be doing, do not start, do not try because you can only succeed with your members, this is just for you to see ahead".

I always hated my teacher; then again I hate all my teachers. But there was just something about my language arts teacher that I thought was weird…whenever he sat he would cross his legs like a girl!

Yes…you know how guys always have their ankles to the other knee? Well…he was full on thigh-to-thigh! I mean…I wonder if he has any junk because that would be hurting, then again being gay can make you do that too, I know I shouldn't be talking but it's weird having gay teachers and all. Oh, and I guess I should tell you the first hint of gayness I saw in him, first day of school, I knew he must have been since he has a girlish tone AND his name is _._

_MR. SMILEY._

I have rest my case….

When I was given my paper for the project, I just took a glimpse at it, saw the whole page full of words, and shoved it in my backpack, just listening to the teacher explain it to us. I feel like a little kid…having to be told what the hell to do even though it's right on the paper, like if we couldn't read or something.

I just laid my head on the desk, looking out the window watching the sun shine down on the grass and trees, seeing the birds sing happy melodies and me. Stuck inside, listening to a fag treat us like little children. To help my case, he does treat us like retards, therefore I have a right to call him a fag…or whatever else I want, just like everyone else.

* * *

"I'm sooo happy schools over! I couldn't take Mr. Smiley talking to us like that, he's always so mean!" Yugi whined as he pouted.

"Now now Koi, you know better than to use those faces together at the same time.." The pharaoh's voice sounded low. I turned to see why and immediately I could tell that it was something sexual, and I immediately turned away and tried to tune them out just in case any words are said that shouldn't be.

"So uh..Yug, I'm going to go ahead and head home today, s'okay with you right?" I gave him my yug smile; just because he's my best pale does mean he gets his own smile. And as usual, he gave me a smile in return, nodding his head with a slight blush, and I knew the pharaoh was pleased because I bet he was looking forward to messing with the poor guy.

Waving a goodbye to the young male, and of course his dark twin; I headed off to the one place I knew I would be safe…the playground a few ways from home.

* * *

I needed time away from everyone to think. Everything in my mind is like a clusterfuck; nothing matches together, and too many things at once is mayhem. All I could think about is Kaiba…that damn rick mother fucker who ruins my social life, but at the same time, brings me pleasure in a whole new different way.

It's a very confusing subject for sure; I don't know why my feelings have altered for him… Sometimes I wish I could just forget him, move on with my life without the pain. But then again…I feel my mind ache for him; feeling the need for his attention and feeling the need to be the fool just so his eyes can be on me and me alone.

"Well…Just like any dog it would be expected to see a mutt here of all places".

As I swiftly spun around after lifting my upper body up, my eyes came upon a tall, dark, lean figure…a figure I've came to mesmerize as _Kaiba_.

"Tha hell your doin here? Don't call me that either moneybags!" I yelped at him blindly, as usual I bark without thinking…I mean speak!

He looked at me a bit oddly; raising his brow with the same scowl on his face. "You are surely the most…never mind, your not worth my time" and without another word he turned around, heading back to where he must have come from. And I just sat there…slowly watching his figure fades from my eyes, I watched as my heart slowly sank into the black ink.

* * *

It seemed like forever until I saw the door to my apartment, a part of me was happy to see home, but another part of me wretched to be stuck in this hell hole for god knows how long. I fiddled with the key; trying not to make too much noise, but at the same time the damn lock wanted to say otherwise.

When I finally was able to get inside my house, I found my dad waiting for me; his face in a big scowl, or maybe anger. He of course reeked of alcohol and his face slowly changed to a deep red.

"Where the hell have you been boy? It's fucking late and there's no fucking dinner you ingrate!" The drunken man approached me vigorously, slamming his fist into my diaphragm, making me cough as I was smashed onto the door.

"I-I'm sorry… I was-"and again came another bruise; right into my right cheek. I wiped the blood on my jacket as I stared into his hollow eyes. I wanted to fight him, but the coward inside me screamed no…

My friends always called me brave and strong; I loved that, I loved the praise they gave me. But, they never knew how much of a coward I really was in my private life, how much I would love to just crawl under a rock and rot; to just get away from the pain. If they knew, what would happen? No matter how many fights I've gotten in, none was as fierce and intimidating as my dad…I could never…not against him.

As his punches and kicks violated my body, slowly I started to feel numb, and the last thing I ever saw that night, was the floor, blood, and the strong stench of alcohol invading my nose and lungs. After that, my vision faded with only one last thought before I fell unconscious…

_Kaiba…_

_TBC?  
_


	4. Please Just Look at Me

_Well I must say! When I saw reviews for this story I was thinking "flamers" or people who think they know Jap. Shit an want to dumbly correct me. ANYWAYS! I know I don't deserve it, and I absolutely LOVE you guys who give me hits but I want to thank specific people who are willing to take a few seconds of their reading life to review this, since I wasn't sure if this story should continue or not but I got some encouragement._

_SPECIAL THANKS:_

_**Snapekicksass**_

_**mednin**_

_**DevilsNvrCry**_

_**Sasu-Sama' Sarukiji-Sempai**_

_**OnePlotThickens**_

Oh! And remember, I either do this is 1st person (joey/seto), or 3rd!

**Joey In Wonderland**

_Chapter 4: Please just look at me_

* * *

"Kaiba…Kaiba!" I felt my palms clench onto the soft rich fabric that covered my body in such warmth. To tell him would be taboo, but at the same time..Why give a damn? I've had the worst thrown at me, hell, I even lived with the worst.

Then again…what truly would be the worst would be the rejection of the one you love. _Shit._

"Mutt? Joey are you there? Hey!" I felt kaiba's hands cling tightly around both my arms, shaking me with a tone I never would think of hearing from him. And my name, oh how I longed to hear him yell my name, or whisper it in a tone that was far from aggressive.

Sadly though, this was not some fairytale. This was a cruel thing called life; God throws tests at you to see if you're capable of handling them, he even does it to test your faith, to see if even hell breaks loose on you; would you stay on his side?

I had to wake up, no matter how much I loved him, how much I want to be in my own little world…eventually everyone has to wake up, even me.

"Y-Yea? Sorry…I guess I don't feel to well ya know" my voice waivered, it was so unsteady...

"Why didn't you answer me! I was calling your name for over a minute or two now mutt" I heard his inner growl. I could tell he was trying hard not to throw everything at me all at once; I'm quite impressed.

"Look money bags, I'm sorry for being such a burden, does that make you happy? By some miracle if I find that fucking bell I'll ring it okay?" I wanted to yell at him with all my might, just to show him that I can be strong too…even in this position not all my pride will fade.

"I don't look for fights with you all the time okay, Mokuba's nice enough to stay in the same room with me and not interrogate me all at once, get some of that rich shit called class Kaiba!" I hated this. And at this moment…yea…I hated _him._

Was it a mistake to yell at him? To show him that I won't bow my head each and every time he prances in…maybe. Because after that it was silent; nothing could be heard for about a minute or two, and then I just heard the click noise from the door. At that moment I knew…I was alone.

* * *

"Don't you think we should check up on Joey? He is staying at Kaiba's place now and I don't fully trust him…what if he's making fun of him now that he's blind? Or if he's making fun of him by telling him to pick something up! Or something…" The young multi-colored hair male looked up at his annoyed and confused lover. For a minute he wondered why Yami looked like that, until he remembered what exactly they were doing…

The room was dark, a nice warm temperature with candles lit perfectly; not too dark, but not too light either, just enough to know and see what's going on. Yugi laid on his nice silk-covered bed; completely naked with light red butterfly kisses marked down his neck. And of course Yami, who hovered over him, naked as well; and an unforgettable erection that was quickly going away.

"Ohhh.." was all the young one could say; knowing that he should of probably stayed thinking that instead of ruining a wonderful mood that Yami tried so hard to set up for weeks now, since he could never find the right time or mood-set Yugi wanted to be intimate in.

"Yes…Oh indeed." Was all Yami could say without sounding disappointed or anything of the sort. But he knew that his dark was upset, clearly. "I'm sorry Yami! How can I make it up to you" he wrapped his arms around his dark's neck, lightly whispering in his ear; knowing he couldn't resist this.

"It's okay Aibou…I think you did the trick" The older one whispered back, nipping his ear as he began to force a kiss upon the other's soft pale lips. Yugi could tell this was going to take awhile seeing as though they barely do it and two; his sexual urges are big on the meter.

'_Oh boy…I'm really gunna get it now' _Yugi thought this time.

'_Yes Aibou…yes you are'_ the Pharaoh startled him by using the mind link, continuing his ministrations on the younger man.

* * *

"Kaiba…I think you should check on Joey he-"

"Mokuba, you damn well know that mutt is stubborn. He went ahead and insulted me, and you think I should go back in there and try to be nice to him? It was bad enough being in the same room!" Ruffling the papers in my grasp I tried to keep my mind occupied. But sadly I think Mokuba could even tell that much.

And to make matters worse, Mokuba came in all of a sudden, telling me to go in and make sure he was okay.

"Kaiba I heard what happened in there…I know you told me not to spy so stop giving me the evil eyes!"

Indeed. Sometimes I do have a foolish brother. I love him dearly but at the same time I was hoping my dagger eyes would scare him away..think he knows better than that too. "Mhm."

"And well…be easy on him! You don't know what kind of life joey has and I love Joey! He's nice and really good to me..He's an awesome friend". It was at that moment I had no other words to say…that mutt was pretty nice to Mokuba, he was buddies with him no matter his relationship with me. All I could do was stare into my brother's eyes, and just hope that he will leave.

"I'm just saying…maybe you should try and be nicer, and also try to understand where he is coming from. I mean, it's no secret right brother?"

"What" quickly recovering from being baffled, sadly I only caught a glimpse of my little brother's smirk, and the plain white door that followed right along, clicking into place once again.

Leaning back into my chair I couldn't help but think about Joey. Only in my mind was calling his name safe enough. I was never a man to really share my feelings, or to care about so many people. Mokuba was and will be my only family, and to show affection to anyone else?..I feel that if I ever do then it would be betraying my brother as well.

But I must, should I not? To just sit here; seeing him only when I have good excuses. I don't fully recall when my feelings for the mutt turned into something so…'pink'. It just sort of happened after talking to him more often, and I guess it was kind of my fault for wondering how it would be to love someone else, especially another male, and especially someone like _him_.

I have to move…I have to go before it's too late. I need to see him, and fix the problem I have created. I was too self-minded to even think about how Joey must be feeling…how scary it must be to lose sight, and to have the thought of seeing only darkness wherever you go for the rest of your life. And with that courage, I shall go confront him, and try to change things, even just a little bit.

* * *

Darkness is a nasty poison. Something that can and will slowly devour your soul day by day, hour by the hour. And to be here in this mess…all I truly wanted was his affection, and instead this poison just made me look even more like a fool.

I cared for him so much, I love him. A cold hearted man who cares about no one but his brother, and the company that he runs..yes, that's the man I have come to love. Why exactly? Why him…I want to jump, I want to fly somewhere else far away, and just be safe, stay safe, and sleep for eternity.

"J-Joey?..."

That voice? Why so worrisome? I don't understand what is happening right now..is this a dream?

"Joey.."

W-What? I feel something warm on my face…oh dear god, please no..

Slowly my arms rose to my face, wiping away the access liquid. Slowly turning back to where the voice was heard, I felt enough power rise in me. "Yes?"

"Why were you crying? "I wasn't" "Sure you weren't. I'm not a fucking genius for nothing you mutt." "Right..you called me by my name.." "What?-.."

I was slightly amused; I might have caught him off guard a bit.

"Tch…I just wanted to know if you were okay. I have been a bit stressed lately so I kind of took it out on you." Light tapping was echoing soothingly through the air, trying to avoid an awkward atmosphere.

I could tell Kiba was trying his best to be nicer, and because of that I might have let out a small chuckle of amusement. "What?" I hear his voice vibrate with irritation. I simply shook my head. "Nothing at all" I calmly and quietly spoke. The longer he was here every day, the more I yearned for him to be around. I have slowly adjusted myself so I could always know he was here, by the scent he gives off. There are times where I hear his voice fill with kindness, or when he feels embarrassed. Sometimes I see him as a vicious woman; very sensitive and always bumbling out stuff .

Is that too weird for me? I don't even know anymore. Nowadays anything seems weird to me.

* * *

_'I AM ALWAYS RIGHT HERE BESIDE YOU.'_

So sweet

Pure bliss.

Perfection..

"I love you, always and forever my dear.."

His voice was like a far away whisper, I felt my body heat up more under him. If I had to pick a place, it would definitely be this shower; big and filled with all the precious memories of me and _him_.

"Joey..open your eyes, I want you to watch me please you" his voice was soft, loving, and gentle. It was embarrassing but I managed to watch him kiss down my lower abdomen, kissing the inside of my thighs. I let out a light moan as his tongue danced upon them, all the while the shower pouring down onto us.

Before I knew it, beautiful chocolate hues met mine.

"Could I be any happier?.." the words softly slipped out without me truly knowing it.

"No. Depend on me, and only me..give me everything Joey.." He embraced me into another hug, but this time, it felt so beautiful. At the same time…it's as if this moment has happened before.

"Don't forget Joey.."

"wha-?" before I could finish, his lips met mine, and without another word, his hips thrusts hard against mine, as he slowly made his way into making love to me, as if it was the very first time.

* * *

_**So sorry! I have been working on this for EVER. Just could never really find the right way to get this one done so hopefully I will be right on track with the next chapter. This one just took so long I don't know what's exactly going on..lol**_

_**Next chapter will be longer and better I promise~**_


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